[Valerie]

We know the Bible warns us not to be unequally yoked with an unbeliever.
But how about, when you're married to a Believer, and they are not at the same place with you in your desire to serve?
Is that a different way, of being unequally yoked?
What if their passion is dim by comparison?
What if you feel a calling on your life yet your spouse does not hear it-what would that mean? Could be a pastoral calling, to the mission field, a particular ministry-how does one procede when their spouse is not on the same page?

My pastor once shared in the early days of their marriage and of his calling, his wife felt he loved the church more than her. They're way beyond those times now.

Asking these questions, knowing some struggle with this issue and maybe there are those who can offer Godly counsel

[Simon Peter]

Valerie, on 28 July 2010 - 05:58 AM, said:

We know the Bible warns us not to be unequally yoked with an unbeliever.
But how about, when you're married to a Believer, and they are not at the same place with you in your desire to serve?
Is that a different way, of being unequally yoked?
What if their passion is dim by comparison?
What if you feel a calling on your life yet your spouse does not hear it-what would that mean? Could be a pastoral calling, to the mission field, a particular ministry-how does one procede when their spouse is not on the same page?

My pastor once shared in the early days of their marriage and of his calling, his wife felt he loved the church more than her. They're way beyond those times now.

Asking these questions, knowing some struggle with this issue and maybe there are those who can offer Godly counsel

Some commentators take the term 'equally yoked' as a military term... to mean that all the officers on the frontlines of the battlefront can hook their shields together and press forward as a unit instead of individually fighting the enemy. We certainly don't want to hook shields with someone in the line that doesn't recognise who the enemy is.

Another thought to some of the questions, Valerie... are ones that married couples need to work together to resolve the issues and go forth together with love and respect... instead of each going their own way... that's not God's design. The natural thing to do when the going gets tough is leave... vs... work together and address the issues and resolve them.

I'm sure everyone that's married knows whatI"m talking about. We have huge misunderstandings and challenges that we need to work through instead of just walking away from them.
Simon Peter sounds as though he has all his ducks in a row... not true... ask my wife... There's time we have serious work on our hands. :-(

IMO..Our divorce rates are ever increasing because of people leaving their spouse instead of following God's design. Patiently working together to become one in faith and in spirit.

Simon Peter

[Valerie]

thank you Simon Peter, I agree with you on all you said, (good visual, by the way) I guess what I'm specifically speaking of is when a person feels a call on their life, and their spouse, does not share the same call or vision-would it mean it isn't from the Lord, then, or just patiently pray and wait to see if they eventually get the same sense of the Lords calling, or would one procede, by putting the call of the Lord before their spouses hesitation? It's probably happened too, amongst the Amish wanting to leave-their spouse not ready or willing.

[Henry Byler]

Quote

Valerie said: I guess what I'm specifically speaking of is when a person feels a call on their life, and their spouse, does not share the same call or vision-would it mean it isn't from the Lord, then, or just patiently pray and wait to see if they eventually get the same sense of the Lords calling, or would one procede, by putting the call of the Lord before their spouses hesitation?

Out here on Friday afternoons we have a Pastor and his wife on a radio call-in show. This Pastor and his wife are well respected in the Christian community and by myself also. I find him to be a humble man and she has a vibrant women's ministry. This question came up from a caller who called in. The Pastor's wife said earlier in their marriage she felt that she had a calling from God for a particular ministry, I guess pretty strongly felt it was what the Lord wanted her to do. But, he did not agree with it, did not feel it. She then said, her first calling was to be obedient to her husband as the spiritual leader of the home. So, she did not do this ministry and she said, God has blessed them greatly with many ministries since that time.

I felt when I heard them talk about it, what a testimony of a man and wife who I consider to be mature and wise in the Lord, were obedient to what they knew at the time and their lives have been rich in serving the Lord. I have in the past not always done things, God's way, but, I have seen it works better in the long run when you do.

As for, whether it is from the Lord or not, I suppose it is hard for someone else to make that call. From the outside looking in, it depends on the ministry, does it bring a lot of seperation between the man & wife. If it does, I am inclined to think that would not be what God would call us to.

Your query just reminded me of that story from them that day, which I was blessed by.

[Valerie]

Thank you Henry, that was a wonderful example!
The wife kept a yielded heart, and by submitting herself as the Word clearly teaches, the Lord broght to pass the desires of her heart. We know there are many times in our walk, we are "waiting on the Lord', maybe for direction, trials, etc.
and even in what seems to be a calling-
There's much we can do while in the waiting room without causing division in the home, as our spouse watches us, just like the case of an unbelieving spouse watching-

My pastor made the statement once, "THE BURDEN IS NOT NECESSARILY THE CALL"-
We can always support and pray, for those burdens, such as MAP, missionaries, etc. there is a great need for intercessors!!